


Three Times Eva Told Neil She Was Pregnant, and the One Time She Actually Was

by sashimiprince



Category: To the Moon Series (Video Games)
Genre: F/M, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Pregnancy, To The Moon, finding paradise, imposter factory, impostor factory, neil is just generally a complete idiot, rosawatts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-08-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:00:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26183860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sashimiprince/pseuds/sashimiprince
Summary: Neil had been tricked too many times before.He was not going to let himself be tricked again.
Relationships: Eva Rosalene/Neil Watts
Comments: 2
Kudos: 26





	Three Times Eva Told Neil She Was Pregnant, and the One Time She Actually Was

**Author's Note:**

> kan gao just released the craziest trailer for impostor factory and im just over here writing the most self indulgent stuff ever.
> 
> anyway, hope yall like this, lol.

“Neil, can I come in?”

After hearing Eva’s voice behind the door, Neil quickly changed his tab from his game of Atari Breakout to one with their most recent patient’s file. He quickly grabbed a random file from his desk and put it in his hands to give the illusion of actually working. He also gave a quick once over of his desk and found himself straightening some of the pens and pencils on his desk and moving the small potted plant Eva had gotten him to a slightly more prominent place on the desk. 

“Neil?” Eva asked again.

Finally, after nervously fixing his desk for a reason he couldn’t exactly pinpoint, Neil pivoted his chair to face towards the door. 

“Come in,” he said, trying to sound casual and like someone who had actually been working.

Eva walked in a second later, her eyes nervously scanning the small room and one of her hands clenched tightly. She let the door shut softly behind her-- not closed all the way, but not open either-- and walked over to Neil’s desk.

Neil raised an eyebrow at Eva.

“Is something wrong?” he asked, leaning forward slightly and starting to feel a little nervous himself.

“No, nothing like that,” Eva said, and Neil felt himself relax. He sunk back into his chair, setting the file he was holding down onto the desk with a sigh before looking back up at Eva.

“Then what’s up?”

“Well…” Eva started, before looking at Neil’s desk and subsequently picking up the file he had just put down.

“Were you just reading this?” she asked after a moment.

Neil paused.

“Yes?” he said, scrunching his face slightly.

“This is your computer installation instruction manual,” she said simply, turning the collection of pages around for Neil to see. He wondered how he had missed that.

“Ah, well, you know,” Neil said, trying to make a smooth recovery. “Just making sure I did everything right. Never can be too careful, right?”

Eva gave Neil a look before setting the booklet back onto Neil’s desk and switching the topic of conversation.

“I have something to tell you.”

“Alright,” Neil said slowly, raising an eyebrow.

“I’m pregnant.”

Neil froze as Eva tapped her fingers on Neil’s desk, looking at him expectantly for a response. Neil, however, could only stare at her in shock, having no idea what to say.

Eva sighed.

“Neil?” she asked again, hoping to prompt a response.

“Is it Rob’s?” was the first thing out of Neil’s mouth. He didn’t intend to say it-- he didn’t even know the thought was on his mind-- until he clumsily spit it out.

Eva pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed disappointedly, her shoulders slouching slightly.

“Why in the world would it be Rob’s?” she asked, her hand still clenched tightly on her nose and her eyes still closed. “And why is that the first thing you would say to me after I tell you that I’m pregnant?”

“I don’t know!” Neil said quickly, incredibly flustered. “This is really big information! Important information! Incredibly life changing information! How would you want me to react in a situation like this?”

Eva continued looking at Neil, whose mouth was agape and eyes were wide.

“So you’re just going to have a baby? A whole human baby? A baby that’s yours? And it’s going to come into the office? Wait, no, that would be dumb, no one would bring a baby into the office, I think that goes against baby protocol…”

Eva cracked a small smile at Neil’s ramblings before quickly trying to suppress it, but Neil caught on.

“Why are you laughing?” Neil asked slowly.

“I’m so sorry,” Eva said, her words now stifled through laughter she was trying desperately to suppress but inevitably failed to. Neil could only look at her with a raised brow.

“Roxie gave me twenty dollars to prank you,” she continued. At that moment, Neil’s door opened to show Roxie and Rob behind it, Rob smiling slightly amused and Roxie with tears in her eyes from suppressing laughter.

“Oh my _god,”_ Roxie finally said, running into the room with Rob following behind her. “That was so great. Thank you so much, Eva, you’re a true comedian.”

“I know,” Eva said coolly, confidently taking the twenty dollar bill from Roxie’s outstretched hand. 

Neil slouched back into his seat.

“So… you’re…” he said, running one of his hands through his hair, running through all of the information he had just received in the past few minutes.

“You just got pranked!” Roxie yelled in a slightly obnoxious voice, causing Eva and Rob to laugh. “Man, you were really freaked!”

“Of course I was freaked! I’d say my response was a pretty normal one!” Neil defended.

 _“Is it Rob’s?”_ Rob repeated, amused and looking down on Neil with crossed arms, a small smirk on his face. Neil’s face turned red.

“W-well…” Neil sputtered.

“Now, here’s the million dollar question…” Roxie said, tapping her finger on her chin, looking at Neil with a mischievous smile. _“Why_ was Neil so panicked about this information?”

“Because a coworker just told me she was pregnant!”

Roxie squinted her eyes and her smile grew a little wider.

“Or is it maybe because--”

“Don’t you guys have work to do?” Neil said, a little louder than he had hoped but still achieving his goal of cutting Roxie off. “Please leave my office.”

“Right, of course, Neil,” Eva said. “We’ll let you get back to your computer instruction manual.”

“Leave before I call security.”

Eva, Rob and Roxie left the room in snickers, Roxie’s a little louder than the other’s, and Neil put his head in his hands and sighed deeply.

He then thought about Roxie’s question. Why was he so panicked about Eva’s news?

 _That’s a question for another time,_ he decided, and turned to his computer to look for some actual work to distract himself with.

* * *

A few months, and some years later, Neil finally got up the courage to ask Eva out on a date. And to his surprise, she said yes and actually enjoyed herself. And then went on another one. And another one. Until Neil could finally call Eva his girlfriend without feeling like he was dreaming.

The two of them were currently at a Sigmund Christmas party-- Neil tried as hard as he could to stay home alone and order Chinese food, but Eva told him that if he was going to be her boyfriend, he needed to do boyfriend things. And she was right; Neil would never admit it, but he had thought about being Eva’s boyfriend a lot. The least he could do was do things with her when he was actually her boyfriend.

“Hey, guys!” Roxie said with a bright smile, walking over to where Eva and Neil were standing. She was wearing a tacky green and red sweater, complete with a big golden bow to show that she was a Christmas present. A tag was taped to the front of the sweater reading “From Santa!” in Roxie’s oddly nice handwriting. She was holding two red solo cups in her hand.

“I didn’t expect to see you here, Neil,” Roxie said, stopping in front of them and frowning slightly. “You normally try every trick in the book to get out of socializing at parties.”

“Ah, what can I say,” Neil said sheepishly, running his hand over the back of his neck. “Parties are more enjoyable when you have the right company with you.”

Eva rolled her eyes, commenting, _“That was so cheesy,”_ as Roxie awwed. 

“Anyway!” Roxie continued brightly. “I got you guys something from the bar.”

“You mean from Eddie who decided to stand near all the alcohol and make everyone else’s drinks?” Neil said, reaching his hand out to take one of the drinks from Roxie.

“That’s exactly what I mean,” Roxie said with a wink. She pushed the other red solo cup still in her hand towards Eva, who politely waved her hand to decline.

“Oh, no, I probably shouldn’t,” she said.

Roxie retracted her hand and cocked her head. “Why?”

“Yeah, come on, Eva,” Neil said, bringing his own drink up towards his mouth. “It’s no big deal. We can just get a taxi ride home.”

“No, it’s not that,” Eva replied. “It’s that I’m pregnant.”

Neil choked on his drink, causing him to go into a wild coughing fit. Eva stared at him with a raised eyebrow as Roxie looked at her with wide eyes.

 _“Pregnant?”_ Roxie asked as Neil continued to cough.

“Yeah,” Eva responded. “And try to keep this quiet… not everyone knows.”

“Like your boyfriend, it seems,” Roxie said, glancing back over at Neil who was hunched over and just barely got over his coughing fit.

“Yeah,” Eva said. “Like that.”

Neil stood back up, taking a deep breath, but still having no idea what to say.

“But pregnant? Wow!” Roxie said, in a more hushed tone than before. “That’s exciting! Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl? Or twins? Oh my god, is it twins?”

Roxie had put her arms on Eva’s shoulders, shaking her back and forth more intensely the longer she kept talking.

“I don’t think it’s twins, Roxie,” Eva said calmly and put Roxie’s arms back to her own sides. “And besides, I just found out. I barely know anything.”

“Well, if it’s a girl, you’ll definitely name it after me, right?”

Eva smiled.

“We’ll have to think about it, won’t we, Neil?” she said sweetly, turning towards her boyfriend whose face was still frozen with shock.

“...Neil?” she asked again. Neil blinked a few times in a daze.

“Pregnant?” was all he could say after a moment.

Eva clicked her tongue. “Yep.”

“Like… for real?” 

Eva snickered, and Neil’s stretched face of shock quickly scrunched into a disappointed one. He rolled his eyes and Eva further devolved into more snickers.

“Okay. Yeah. No, I get it, I see what happened,” Neil said, crossing his arms and turning away from Eva, who was still laughing.

“Wait… so you’re not pregnant?” Roxie asked.

“No,” Eva said through a giggle. “No, I’m not.”

“Wait,” Neil said, pointing a finger at Roxie. “You weren’t in on it this time?"

“Nope,” Roxie said. “She really had me fooled. That was good!” she said, turning to Eva and starting to laugh as well.

“No! No, it wasn’t,” Neil said defensively. “Don’t praise her for that. You can’t do the same prank twice and say it was good. That’s just called being unoriginal.”

“She really got you good,” Roxie snickered.

“She got you too!” Neil huffed.

“I’ll take that drink now,” Eva said, grabbing the drink still in Roxie’s hand.

“No you won’t,” Neil said, quickly grabbing Eva’s drink with his free hand. “After the stunt you just pulled I think I deserve your drink.”

Eva narrowed her eyes at him. “Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously,” Neil said, narrowing his eyes back at her. “And since you’re not pregnant, it should be no problem at all to go get yourself another drink.”

Eva couldn’t help but smirk as she shook her head and walked off.

“Glad to know you’d be prepared to have a kid, though, Neil,” Roxie commented. Neil took a sip from one of the two drinks he was holding.

“Tell me in a few years and then we’ll see how I react.”

* * *

“Isn’t it bad luck to see the bride before the wedding?”

Neil asked this through a smile, standing in front of the large chapel doors where, just behind it, a large wedding procession was taking place. However, that was one of the furthest things on Neil’s mind right now. Right now, he was focused on the woman in front of him, wearing a long flowing white wedding gown, her hair up in a fancy bun and looking back at him with the same loving smile he had.

“I’ve never been one to be superstitious,” Eva answered.

“True,” Neil shrugged, “but if this wedding goes off the rails it’s on you.”

“Knowing our track record, this wedding is going to go off the rails whether we saw each other beforehand or not.”

“That’s… probably accurate,” Neil said. “But maybe we shouldn’t speak those things into the universe anymore.”

Eva laughed. “Of course.”

Neil looked down and took Eva’s hands in his own and looked into her eyes. “Eva…” he said, before trailing off, looking for anything to say.

Eva cocked an eyebrow. “What?”

“It’s just that… I…” Neil felt himself turning red. “I’ve thought about this day way more than I’d like to admit.”

“I know, Neil,” Eva said. “You can pretend to be a tough hardass all you want, but at the end of the day I know your true sappy center.”

“I’m not sappy!”

“Neil, you once cried at a commercial for a dishwasher.”

“I was having an off-day!” Neil said defensively. “And the family in the commercial just loved each other _so much,”_ he said, slightly quieter and his eyes starting to water.

Eva smiled and rolled her eyes.

“I just can’t wait to marry you,” Neil said, holding her hands tighter. 

“I hope that was the plural you,” Eva said.

Neil paused. He squinted at Eva, confused.

She casually pointed at her stomach, and it took a few seconds before Neil totally comprehended what she meant. His eyes went wide.

“Oh my _god!”_ he said excitedly, but still trying to keep his voice down.

Eva immediately breaks, laughing and waving her hand. Neil slumps slightly and starts to glare at her.

“I’m sorry,” Eva said through restrained giggles. “It’s just too easy at this point.”

“You’re seriously going to mess with me on my wedding day? _On my wedding day?”_

“On _our_ wedding day,” Eva quickly corrects. “And yes, obviously. You were a fool to think otherwise.”

Neil let go of Eva’s hands and crossed his arms against his chest. “I’m leaving you at the altar for that.”

“That’s going to be a little difficult since you’re at the altar before me.”

“I’ll figure it out.”

Eva lowers her eyes at Neil. “You seriously better not leave me up there.”

“I’m seriously considering it.”

Eva lightly hits Neil on the arm and he smiles.

“I need you to know that I’m not going to fall for that again, though,” Neil said.

“Right. Of course,” Eva said, in the same manner that one would talk to a small child.

“I’m serious! I’m not falling for it again.”

“Neil, I seriously doubt that. You are the most gullible person I know.”

Before Neil could retort back, loud, swelling organ music began to play behind the doors of the chapel room. Both turn to look at the door and then back at each other.

“That’s your cue,” Eva said.

“We aren’t done here, you know,” Neil said, pointing a finger accusingly at Eva. “I’m still mad about this tired and completely overdone prank.”

Eva takes Neil’s shoulder and spins him to face the doors, pushing him slightly towards them. “I’ll see you up there.”

Neil turned around to Eva one last time to point at his eyes, and then towards Eva, before walking down the aisle to finally marry her.

* * *

About a year after Neil and Eva got married, everything was still relatively the same around the office. At first, some of the older coworkers would gush about their new romance and how they always knew the two of them would finally get together, Roxie would sometimes randomly tear up thinking about how happy she is that her friends finally got married, and Rob… well, was almost exactly the same as he always was. One time in the break room, he said a gruff ‘congratulations,’ to Neil before walking back to his office, and that was that.

Neil had been walking towards the workroom at the end of the hallway to get some copies of the large stack of files he was holding when he saw Roxie, slightly further down the hall, with her hand clenched tightly around something. She quickly and quietly snuck into Eva’s office. He paused in the middle of the hallway, slightly confused by what he had just seen. 

After a moment, he walked up to the door and knocked on it. He heard Roxie say, “just a second!” before opening up the door. She only opened it a few inches so Neil could only see Roxie and nothing else in the office. She had a strange, almost forced smile on her face.

“Hey… Rox…” Neil said slowly, trying to look into the office, but Roxie quickly stepped out of the room and closed the door behind her. He finally looked back at Roxie, still obviously confused. “Is… everything okay?”

“Yep!” Roxie responds quickly. “Everything’s just swell in there.”

Neil blinked at her.

“Is Eva in there?”

“She… is, yeah,” Roxie said. 

Another pause.

“Can I see her?” Neil asked with more emphasis.

“Oh, yeah! Of course!” Roxie said. She turned around into the office, placing herself in front of Neil, and started opening the door very slowly. “Hey Eva it’s me again along with your husband Neil Watts,” she said, all very quickly, before finally opening the door the full way.

Neil saw Eva sitting at her desk, going through her purse and seeming a little nervous, but other than that completely normal. She looked up from her bag and smiled at him.

“Oh, hey, Neil,” Eva said casually.

“Hey, Eve,” Neil responded. “I just saw Roxie duck into your room super fast and kinda suspiciously, so I just wanted to make sure everything was okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” Eva said, slightly faster than normal. “We’re… hunky dory.”

Neil raised an eyebrow at her.

“Never in my life have I ever heard you say the words _hunky dory,”_ he said. 

“Maybe I just started,” Eva said defensively.

Neil opened his mouth again, trying to press her more on why she was suddenly acting weird, but before he could say anything Roxie began to speak.

“Well, that’s besides the point,” she said, waving her hand and cutting Neil off. “We were just having some girl talk anyway, just gabbing.”

Neil tried to talk again, but Roxie quickly asked, “Don’t you have to take those documents somewhere anyway?”

Neil looked down at the stack of papers in his hands and then back up to Roxie. “Uh, I guess… I mean, I’m not in any rush or any--”

Roxie took Neil’s shoulders and started pushing him towards the door. “Well, it sounds like you should get right on that, then!” she said cheerfully. “Talk to you later, bye,” she finished quickly, before shutting the door in Neil’s face.

Neil stood at the closed door for a few moments, trying to work through what had just happened. He felt that Roxie had always had a few screws loose, so he’s used to just brushing off a lot of the stuff she says, but even Eva seemed to be acting rather weird as well.

He decided that whatever was going on in there he would deal with later and continued towards the copy room. A few seconds later, he saw Roxie and Eva leave the office together and start quickly walking in the opposite direction, Eva holding her purse tightly in her hands. He watched for a few moments before shrugging and continuing on his way down the hallway. 

An hour or so later, when Neil had finally finished all of his copies and had, for the most part, forgotten about his strange interaction with Roxie and Eva earlier that day, Eva walked into his office. Her face was flushed and she looked rather nervous.

“Hey,” he said, spinning his chair to face her. “You okay?”

“I have something really important to tell you,” she responds quickly.

“Okay then,” Neil said, reclining back into his seat slightly. “Spill those beans, girl.”

Eva stands there looking at him, rocking slightly back and forth on her feet. Neil continues looking at her, getting progressively more and more confused.

“Eva?” he pressed.

“Well, I just… I don’t know if I should tell you now. Maybe I’ll just wait until later,” Eva said, quickly walking back towards the door.

“Wait!” Neil said. Eva paused. “You can’t just tell me you have something important to tell me and then just leave without saying anything at all.”

Eva let out a deep breath and took her hand off the door handle, walking over to where Neil was sitting down. Neil watched as she started to rummage through her purse before pulling something out and setting it down on his desk.

“There,” she said.

Neil leaned forward slightly to get a better look at what she just set down.

It was a pregnancy test.

“So…” Neil said slowly, “...two lines means you’re pregnant?”

“Yeah,” Eva responded.

It was a _positive_ pregnancy test.

“So you’re pregnant?” Neil asked, still looking at the test.

“It would seem that way,” she responded.

Neil looked at the test, then up at Eva, then back down at the test.

“I just set up a doctor’s appointment for next week,” Eva said. “They’re going to do some tests to make sure I’m actually pregnant and everything, maybe even do an early ultrasound, but… even though nothing’s totally confirmed, I really do think I’m pregnant.” Eva paused and swallowed nervously. “And I want you to be there with me.”

Neil still doesn’t say anything.

“You’re being a lot more calm about this than I thought you’d be,” Eva said.

Neil shrugged. “Well. I know this is a prank now.”

Eva blinked as Neil turned back to his computer and started to type, completely unfazed by everything Eva had just told him.

“Neil.”

“Yeah?”

“Are you being serious right now?”

Neil grabbed the pregnancy test from off his desk and handed it back towards Eva. “I told you I wasn’t falling for this again.”

Eva grabbed the test from his hands and shoved it into his face. “I just gave you a _positive pregnancy test.”_

“Yeah,” Neil said coolly. “You can buy those things online.” He turned back around to his computer, smiling cockily. “You’re going to have to try harder than that, Rosalene.”

“I’m sorry, _Rosalene?”_ Eva asked, her eyes going wide and crossing her arms.

“I mean, come on,” Neil said with a shrug. “The whole thing with Roxie’s nervousness, her taking something into the office-- I’m assuming the pregnancy test-- you quickly leaving and then coming back into my office, even more nervous than before…” Neil turned to face Eva with a smile. “All great stuff. Really great acting, I commend you guys. But I told you I wasn’t going to fall for this again.”

Eva looked at him with a glare and was met with only a smile from Neil.

“I’m serious,” Neil continued. “Come back when you’re actually pregnant or when you’re ready to admit that this is a prank.”

Eva huffed and turned for the door. “I cannot believe I married the most stubborn man on this planet.”

“I cannot believe that I married a woman who would do the same bad prank on four separate occasions,” Neil retorted, before Eva quickly slammed the door behind her.

The next few days, Eva still continued to be mad at Neil. Every time they went out for coffee she’d order a decaf, when Neil suggested sushi for dinner Eva reminded him that pregnant women can’t have raw fish, and when he later suggested going to a bar, Eva reminded him that along with raw fish, pregnant women also _can’t have alcohol, Neil._

Even later that week, Eva stayed home to go to the morning doctor’s appointment.

“This is your last chance to go with me,” Eva said, watching Neil get dressed for work.

“Eva, as I’ve said before, I’m good.”

Eva rolled her eyes.

“You’re seriously going to miss the first doctor’s appointment about _our child?”_

“No,” Neil said. “What I’m going to miss is you bringing me into a room full of all of my friends to laugh at me for falling for the same dumb prank again, with a huge banner hanging from the wall reading _you are an idiot.”_

“You are unbelievable.”

Neil turned around to wink at Eva. “Don’t I know it.”

He headed into work and for the first few hours, everything was completely normal. He was working on finishing up some of the paperwork for a case he and Eva did just a few weeks ago but, like with most of their cases, it became more intensive than originally planned. The aftermath of that was weeks of paperwork to do.

Suddenly, Neil heard his door swing open quickly and angrily. Before he could even react at all, someone had stuck something to his forehead with tape. The thing was large enough to obscure his vision but too close for him to accurately make out what it was.

“Hello?” Neil asked.

“If you still think I’m lying after this, I think I’m seriously going to hit you,” he heard Eva’s voice say to him.

“What did you just stick to my forehead?”

“Use your eyes and look.”

Neil reached up and unsticked the tape from his forehead. He saw Eva glaring at him, tapping her foot, and looking at him expectantly.

Neil glanced down at the photo in his hands.

He sees an ultrasound.

The photo is mostly all black, with a large cavity in the center of it, but there’s one spot in the middle that was light gray, fairly small, and roughly the shape of a bean. The date written in the top corner was that day’s date.

Neil stared at it for a long time before finally looking back up at Eva.

“Well?” she asked.

Neil paused a moment longer.

“Is this real?” he asked quietly, almost too quietly to be heard.

Eva rolled her eyes. “What do you think?” she said sarcastically.

Neil looked back at the photo in his hands. It didn’t seem fake-- the paper was thick and glossy, nothing like the regular paper they had in the office. And the date that was written in the top right corner seemed real-- he couldn’t see any obvious signs of editing.

He looked back up at Eva.

“We’re having a baby?” he asked, only slightly louder than before.

“Yes.”

Neil jumped out of his seat, sending it rolling back and swiveling into the wall of his office. “We’re having a baby?” he repeated, much louder than before and with a large grin on his face. Eva’s face softened when she saw that Neil now, finally, believed her.

“Yes, we are,” she said, much kinder that time and with a smile on her face as well.

 _“We’re having a baby!”_ Neil yelled, probably loud enough for the entire floor to hear them as well. Neil scooped his wife up in a huge bear hug and lifted her off of the ground, spinning her around for a few seconds before gently placing her back on the ground.

“Now there’s the reaction I was looking for,” Eva said, smiling and slightly dizzy.

Neil smiled back at her and pulled her in for a kiss. After a moment, he broke away and placed his hands on her stomach.

“There’s a little baby you in there,” he said.

“Yep,” Eva replied.

“A little baby _us,”_ he corrected himself.

“That’s... how it works, yeah,” Eva responded sarcastically, but still with a small smile growing on her face.

Neil leaned in for another kiss, full of so much elation and joy he could hardly contain himself.

“A baby!” he yelled.

“A baby,” Eva copied, a smile growing on her face.

Neil let out a breath of excitement and nervousness, looking at Eva with all the joy in the world. He wrapped her up in a bear hug again, but left her on the ground this time. Eva wrapped her arms around him and hugged him back.

“If this turns out to be a prank again, I’m not talking to you for a month,” Neil said.

“That sounds pretty nice, actually,” Eva responded.

Neil pulled away from the hug to glare at Eva, causing her to laugh.

“I’m kidding. We’re done with the pranks.”

“We better be,” Neil responded, before wrapping her up in another hug again.


End file.
